Pastor Brent Roam - Purpose, Service & Impact

Pastor Brent Roam joins Rene Knott for a thought-provoking conversation about faith, leadership, and the future of St. Louis.

A Rhodes Scholar, attorney, and Lead Pastor of One Family Church, Brent shares his journey from practicing law to leading one of the region's most diverse and growing congregations.

Together, they discuss the role of faith in public life, building bridges across communities, advancing justice and equity, and creating spaces where people from different backgrounds can come together as one.

From the pulpit to the community, this conversation explores what it means to lead with purpose and serve with impact.

Don't miss this inspiring discussion with one of St. Louis' most influential faith leaders.

Powered by I Got Dan & Midwest BankCentre 

therundownstl.com

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Thank you for joining us for the rundown with Runny Knot. We're coming to you this time from the Tivoli in the Del Mar Loop. This historic cinema is now a house of God. It is the home headquarters for the One Family Church. For this episode, I sat down with its pastor. He is a man of action and a man of Avenger. A man who went all the way out to the West Coast to chase his dream before he got his calling and returned home and returned. What chapter are we on right now?

SPEAKER_01 1:32

This is chapter, this is chapter three. Chapter three. Chapter three. And we're going to run this one all the way to the end. You're going to run this one all the way out. Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_02 1:42

Do you run it all the way out because you found where you need to be, or because, you know what, I've done enough running?

SPEAKER_01 1:49

I I ran from, now I'm running to. Okay. You know the story of Jonah. God said, go this way. He said, I'm going that way. Um, he went to the belly of the whale, he went to the bottom of the sea, and he said, you know what, let me go, let me go the way God called me. Okay. That's that's my story. Uh I I knew where God was calling me to go from the jump, but I didn't want to go that way. Why not? Well, um, first of all, uh I had seen people go that way, and there was a way that they did it, some some of the folks that I was watching that I thought, I don't want to emulate that life. What I didn't realize at that time is you can go the path that God has called you to go on in in the way that He made you to go. Like you can do it as you. Okay. And I think I didn't recognize that. And then I think the other piece of it was, so there was a knowledge problem. Um, but the knowledge problem is also coupled with a sin problem, right? So if I if I want to, I wanted to disobey God because there's a pleasure in it. Um, there's not a long-term joy in it. But uh yeah, so I was gonna run that out and see, see where it went. And it went to the belly of the well, to the bottom of the sea, just like it always does. And so that's where I said, okay, let me let me turn this thing around and and uh see what I can do if I if I put my heart and mind and passion towards love, caring for people, honor, um and and and do something of meaning and value. And so that was a that was a transformational moment. It was actually my father when my when my dad died, my father was a pastor. He grew up here in St. Louis. When he died, that was the moment for me where I went, huh. That was my that was my turning point. I said, What am I what am I fighting against when actually that's the that that's the that's a picture of a of a man that I want to be like. So it had a profound impact on the on the shift in the trajectory.

SPEAKER_02 3:46

But does that journey shape the man today? In other words, had you not gone the non-traditional route, do you think you'd be as rich in knowledge as you are today?

SPEAKER_01 3:57

All things work together for the good of those who love God. Right. So so he doesn't waste anything. So um now those experiences from my younger years serve me well. Um in two facets at least. One facet, uh when people come to me with their stuff, I'm not surprised. It doesn't sho I'm I'm not I'm not easily shocked.

SPEAKER_05 4:21

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 4:21

Um and I think the second way is uh having seen a way of life deeply, I I I one way I put it is I already wrung it out. Okay. I don't uh I'm not drawn to things that um I ought not to move towards because I've already been there.

unknown 4:42

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 4:43

I I've I've that's a well-tread path, I already understand it. I I already I already wrung that out. So um so yes, I'm sometimes I think, man, I wish I had started doing what I'm doing now earlier. Other times I think I'm glad I didn't do it earlier. I could have blown it up. Yeah. And thank God that uh his timing is perfect.

SPEAKER_02 5:03

Well they say God works a mysterious way. Yes. Yeah, yeah. But is that really mysterious when you think about it? The time of my kills. That's right. What the is going on here, but in the end you go, ah, now I see now I see. Yeah. So this is chapter three. Yeah. Take me back to chapter one. What were you doing?

SPEAKER_01 5:18

Chapter one. Chapter one. Chapter one. Uh I had um I had finished some some educational opportunities and I said, Let me go to Hollywood and see if I can do something out there. I had a couple people that I knew out there. Um, so I went out to LA and I started pursuing TV, film, acting, writing, music, just started going after all of that. Yes. That was that was chapter one.

unknown 5:46

Wow.

SPEAKER_02 5:46

So you're pursuing like that. Yeah. Where did you get the gumption? Where did you get the courage to do that? Because so many people travel to Hollywood thinking, It's my time. Right. I'm gonna be the star. Right. What gave you the belief that it's my time, I'm gonna be the star? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:03

It was a dr it was um it was a desire to this is gonna sound crazy. I wanted to prove that I could do something different from my father, from both of my grandfathers. I I wanted to prove to the world that I could be different. And so that was my way of doing that. Um and I wanted to do it loud and I wanted to do it uh publicly, and I wanted everybody to know about it. So I I there was a drive there. Okay, and uh and so I went out and and I did it. Instant success or did it take a while? It took it took a little while. Okay. Uh, but by the time I got to uh by the time I decided to to end that chapter, um, I was doing all the things that I had set out to do. Wow.

SPEAKER_02 6:51

Yeah. Were you a man about town? I mean, were you doing the true Hollywood scene? Yeah, I was.

SPEAKER_01 6:57

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I was doing I was on TV and doing movies and writing screenplays and uh playing in all the clubs in LA. That's where I actually met my future wife. Uh huh. Uh okay. Yeah. So she she was 18. My father was a Pentecostal preacher, both of my grandfather's Pentecostal preachers. Um, and you know, in that we were in a pretty small environment where people in in our denomination knew of one another. And so people knew Brother Rome's son is out in Hollywood singing in the clubs. And so my future wife was an 18-year-old uh teenager, Pentecostal girl, and said, I gotta see this. So her and some other girls came up to a club called Spaceland out in LA, and my band was playing, and the bouncer came out and said, I there's some young ladies out here to, and so I came out and I, you know, immediately I didn't know them, but I knew I knew them, like we're we were basically fan. We came from the same tribe, you know. So um I got I I snuck them into the back of the club, the silent alarm went off, the bouncer came back and said, What are you doing? I said, Hey, listen, you don't have to worry about these girls. They don't smoke, they don't chew, they don't date the boys who do. They're gonna be fine in here, right? So he let them stay, and that's how I met my future wife. Yeah. Was the love at first sight? I was, I I was, I'm older than her. Okay. I thought to myself, if if she had an older non-Christian sister, that's the kind of girl I would like to date. Yeah. But um, so we admired each other greatly at that time, but our lives were just so wildly different. We didn't we didn't end up getting to together uh it was six years later. Wow. Um before we started before we actually it was eight years later before we before we started dating.

SPEAKER_02 8:44

Did that start grounding your life at that time? When you started dating? Oh, yeah. Oh, we're talking about balance in life and have relationships. Did that start to balance your life and and kind of ground you?

SPEAKER_01 8:55

Absolutely. So it was eight years later when I got with her, and I by that point I knew that I wanted to come back to St. Louis, I wanted to be a pastor. I I knew that God was calling me to do all that. Um but I would not and I had just finished law school actually, and I would not have come back to St. Louis if I hadn't started dating her. Wow. I knew this is where I wanted to be and where I was supposed to be. But I also knew that if I didn't have somebody with me, uh I w I I did not feel like I was gonna be able to do what I was supposed to do solo. So we started dating, and literally after the first phone call, I picked up the phone and I called the law firm of Brian Cave in in St. Louis and said, Hey, I want to move back to St. Louis, I want to come work at your firm. Um I wouldn't have done that if I hadn't called her. So just knowing even the possibility that we would be together helped to begin to ground.

SPEAKER_02 9:52

Yeah, yeah. Thank you very much for picking up this man and straightening his life out. A lot of people are probably thinking you're right now the path that he is now on to this day. So chapter two is law.

SPEAKER_01 10:03

Yeah, so chapter two, um, I was in LA, my father, my father passed away. That was the moment that I began to go, let me do something that brings value to other people. Let me let me see if I can do something. And a friend, uh a friend's girlfriend was in law school, and we were all out one evening, and she's she said, Have you ever considered being a lawyer? I said, Never. I've never not never one time ever thought of that. She said, I think you would be good at it. So I went to the Barnes and Noble, I got the LSAT book, I started looking at it. I said, Okay, I can do this. So I went and applied, did the LSAT.

SPEAKER_03 10:36

You just wouldn't grab the book and say, Oh, maybe a lawyer. This doesn't look too hard. Well, I didn't want to I didn't have the money to buy the book. So I got I I bought a coffee and sat in the Barnes and Noble, read the whole thing. You're that guy. Yeah, it's me. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:49

So uh so that was chapter two. So that was a step closer, right? So then I went went to law school. It was in law school that I had um where I really had um a conversion. Okay. Um and I and I and I started going to church and and my spiritual life just began to kind of transform. And that's when that's when I knew, okay, so I'm in law school, I'm gonna I'm gonna practice law for a period of time, but ultimately I'm gonna become a pastor. Okay. I'll be a pastor, I'll be a person involved in the community, um, bringing transformation. Uh so that was that that was step two. Yeah. Right?

SPEAKER_02 11:24

Yeah. Yeah. So step three, of course, is you now, you know, being a pastor. Yes, sir. Not just a pastor of a little little church on the corner. You decided to be a pastor and grow something. Yeah. Did you at when you first started to think, okay, this is great, but it has to be grander.

SPEAKER_01 11:43

Or did it just evolve that way? It evolved. Yeah. I wanted so I I knew one waters, one plants the seed, God gives the increase. So I knew that. Um I wanted to I wanted to grow, but I also knew that for me to honor God with my life, I needed to be content in all situations. And so I I I literally at the beginning of it said, let's always get better, not worry about bigger. Uh let's serve with excellence, let's care for people really well. Um, let me develop my ability to speak. Let me develop um, you know, structures and systems that will actually bring people closer to God and closer to each other. Um let's really genuinely care for people. Let's be catalyzed by love and mo animated, motivated by love for one another. Um and so if we do that, the outcome is the outcome. And so that was and that's still that's still where I stand with all of that. I I and I tell our staff this all the time. Let's always get better. Don't worry about bigger. Bigger takes care of itself. Okay. Yeah. How big is the congregation though? Wow. On Sundays, they're at least a couple thousand people showing up. Um and that's because we're we're we're now we're capped at at our space. So we're getting ready to do a big renovation in our main uh campus, the Tivoli Theater. We're gonna knock out we're gonna knock out half the inside, double the seating capacity in there, um, add some additional services at our Shaw campus down in the Shaw neighborhood, and then we're gonna plant a third campus within the next year or two.

SPEAKER_00 13:18

In St. Louis, the first question is where did you go to high school? But we like to ask, where do you bank? Because making a difference starts with that choice. At Midwest Bank Center, your dollars don't sit on the sidelines. They build homes, build businesses, our nonprofits, and help our neighbors achieve their dreams. That's how we win by rising together. The future is ours, but the choice is yours. It matters where you bank.

SPEAKER_02 13:48

When you speak to the people, yeah. Is it something that comes from your heart, or do you feel like God moves through you, and that's the message he wants me to give you today, or do you look at it as I want people to feel and and be a certain way, so my messages kind of always stay the same?

SPEAKER_01 14:07

So I think of my job when it comes to preaching as being difficult but simple. So I my perspective on the scripture is that it in and of itself is transformative. It is alive, it is sharper than any two-edged sword, right? It cuts between the bone and the marrow, right? So so the text itself, the word itself, brings transformation. So my job is to faithfully convey it. Okay. And so it's a simple job because I don't have to be, I don't come up with any ideas. I don't have, I don't need to be, my job is just is to convey as powerfully as I can the the content that and then the content does the work. So what's fascinating about Jesus' ministry is that he not only understood the word, but he understood the people. He studied both.

SPEAKER_05 14:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 14:55

And so what he would do is he would, depending on who he was talking to, if he was talking to farmers, he would, he would come up with farmer analogies. If he was talking to shepherds, shepherd analogies. If he was talking to, you know, Sadducees and and religious leaders, he would use or or business folks, he would use. So what he would do is he would study his his the people that he was speaking to, and then he would study the word, and then he would go, let me put these, let me put this in a way that hits you. Right. And so I see that as my job. Right? I've got the text, I need to understand that, and I've got a group of people that I'm called to serve and to love. I need to understand what they're experiencing going through. What questions are they asking? And then I can then I can faithfully bring this to that.

SPEAKER_05 15:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 15:39

Do you during a sermon, do you feel when you know you're hitting everything? Oh yeah, that that you're move you're moving the crowd. So listen to the uh Yeah. So it's so interesting because at at our Tivoli campus, we do three services. Uh usually the earliest service is the most responsive. I think it's because it's morning people. Morning people are ready and they're ready to go. And so I am very much it helps me so much when I'm preaching to gauge what's going on. I always tell the congregation, like, I'll preach shorter if you'll help me. Right? Because I need to know that what I said landed. And if I don't feel like it landed, I'm gonna have to come up with another way of saying it. I'm gonna say the same thing eight different ways until I get it. Right? Once you get that, now I'm like, we're good. Now we can move on. Right? So so it's very much a uh call and response kind of feel for me. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 16:34

Yeah. I can understand that. Yeah. Um one of the things you're doing now, because you you spoke of relationships and community and taking care of your community. Yeah. You're helping people find housing. That's right.

SPEAKER_01 16:46

Helping people afford housing. Tell me about the program. So five years ago, we launched an organization called the FAM. Yeah. Fair Access to Mortgages. The goal of the FAM is to eliminate the racial gap in homeownership throughout St. Louis in one generation. So the vision of the FAM is that 40 years from now, a person will be no more or less likely to own a home based on their race in St. Louis. So what how this all started for me was, you know, I grew up in St. Louis. My grandfather's from St. Louis, my father's from St. Louis, right? Um I've always seen this huge disparity in homeownership, racial disparity in homeownership. I read a book several years ago called The Color of Law. It it uh it sort of lays out in granular detail how we got to where we got to. Um race-based state-sponsored discriminatory practices, you know, across the nation, right? But but in detail. So I'm reading about it, and I live in U City, so I went and pulled the indenture on my house. The indenture on my house, the governing document for my house in U City from 1924 says no Negroes or Malays to live in this neighborhood. And that line was not removed from my indenture until 1993. I've got I've got the indenture. That indenture applies to uh indentures like that and other uh uh other tools like that, implements like that, uh applied to about over 80 percent of the homes in St. Louis that were built before 1950. Okay. So that document attached to my house was like that took the theoretical or the kind of you know, intellectual academic understanding down to like, oh, this this house, this house. And so that's when I said, man, I need to I need to figure out a way to begin to address the histor the consequences of the injustice that had been perpetrated. And so that's when we started the fam. We started the fam with the goal of assisting five first-time black home buyers purchased their first home. Uh the first year we closed on 33 homes, then 70 homes the next year. And now we're at, this is only we're only five years old, but we're at uh just over 400 homes this week. Right? Well our clients have purchased over $70 million worth of real estate, and the average increase in net worth per family on average, for our families, for our clients, is an increase of about $26,000 per family on average if they've owned their home for a year or more. And that's only going up because their own their home value is increasing and their principal is getting lower. So creating generational wealth, uh transforming the city, I mean, and now we're adding some models that are gonna make it even more scalable and sustainable. Um and so this idea of actually eliminating the racial gap in it, I actually believe we can do it. I I I believe we can actually do it. It's gonna take it's gonna take a generation, 40 years. Yes. Um I think we can do it. And I don't think we're I don't think it's just us. I think I think it can be done everywhere.

SPEAKER_02 19:55

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 19:55

I I do.

SPEAKER_02 19:56

Following the model that you have to present.

SPEAKER_01 19:58

Yeah, yeah. And we have no proprietary, there's nothing proprietary about what we're doing. I am not a math guy, I'm not a numbers guy, I I I I'm not a finance person, right? This is not a smart program. This is a simple program. Yeah. Um and and it can be done and anybody can do it. Yeah. It's a justice program. So it's it's not a it's not a charity, it's a justice mission. So it's it's addressing the consequence of historic injustice, right? Making things right that were wrong. That's it. It's safe to say you're a man of action.

SPEAKER_02 20:29

I mean, I have a bias for action. I mean, I I think when you sit and talk with you and and see your motivations for life, you're a person that just doesn't sit still. You're not you're not you're a person that sees it and go, I gotta go get it. That's right. As opposed to, well, eventually it'll come this way or let me go over over that way. That's right. Do you ever get tired? Does it wear you out?

SPEAKER_01 20:49

I don't get tired. Really? I get tired if I'm inactive. Okay. I get energized by action. Yeah. And so I've had to work to rest. I've had to learn to rest. Um, now I have a day of rest. Okay. You know, it's not Sunday. No, not it's Monday for me. That's your best. Right. Yeah. So so I've had to learn to rest because it's healthy for you. But um But I I don't, I don't this does not make me tired. This makes me excited. Like this makes me hungry. I love doing it. The more I do it, the more I want to do it. Yeah. You know? So, yeah, I don't a lot of pastors have burnout. I don't I don't experience that. You know, and I think part of it is the rhythms, right? Uh you gotta eat right, you gotta sleep right, you gotta get good exercise, you gotta, you know, have your family life well oriented, right? So you need all of that. Um and if you have that, I think, you know, it it it creates health, and then health creates opportunity. You know, and opportunity creates more opportunity. You feel good. I feel good.

SPEAKER_02 21:56

And then you see the world in a different perspective as well.

SPEAKER_01 21:58

That's right.

SPEAKER_02 21:58

So if I were to take you back. To that kid that decided to jump up and go to Hollywood from St. Louis. Would he believe you're the guy you are today? No.

SPEAKER_01 22:11

Uh I did not at that time, it's interesting you say that. I would not have s conceived of this as possible. Yeah. This would have been uh I would not have conceived of this life as possible. But you love it, though. I love it. Yeah. I got it. I love it. And if I could I you know, if I could go back and talk to him, I'd say, hey man, it's gonna be alright. Yeah. You know, uh stay at it. You know, you're loved. Uh you know, you're you're gonna you're gonna be all right. Okay. Yeah, you're gonna be all right. Yeah. I would have I would have brought some some some comfort and some encouragement.

SPEAKER_02 22:50

Yeah. Well I'm glad you're bringing comfort and encouragement to people on the street. People who need someone to say, I'm gonna help guide you, get you where you want to go, or get you where you need to be. Yeah. So thank you, ma'am. Hey, man, thank you. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. Uh you know, last time I was in the Tivoli?

SPEAKER_01 23:08

When was that?

SPEAKER_02 23:08

Okay. When Nelly's movie came out. Okay. Um, The Longest Yard.

SPEAKER_01 23:13

Okay, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:14

And they had the red carpet down and you know, Burt Reynolds, everybody came down the red carpet. That was the one and only time in the Tivoli.

SPEAKER_01 23:20

You gotta come back.

SPEAKER_02 23:21

I gotta come back.

SPEAKER_01 23:22

Well, I gotta come hear you. Every Sunday. I gotta come hear you. You know where to find me. Every Sunday. 8 15, 9 45, or with Jared at 1115. I probably do 1115.

SPEAKER_02 23:32

I sleep in. You're talking about sleeping right and eat right and all that. I definitely want to go. I I just feel that um there's something about people who could preach the gospel from the heart, yeah, not just from the scriptures. There's there's some to just read, you know. There's others who look to move people. Yep. And I'm a strong believer in trying to move people. And one of the things about doing this podcast, I want people to get to know who's with me. Yeah. At the same time, understand what motivated them to become who they are. Yeah. And then the advice that they want to give to others. And I what I find is everybody, I don't care what they do today, has gone the wrong way at some point in their life. That's right. And then something pulled them back in the direction. Right. Nine times out of say twelve, yes, it was a relationship that made you straighten up and start to okay, I need to be responsible now, start moving that direction.

SPEAKER_01 24:32

So I mean, what I love about this is like it's information, it's inspiration, but it's aimed at transformation. And so it's it's this uh it's this desire to convey knowledge and to encourage people, but like you said, with the goal of moving people from where they are to where they need to be. So it starts, it starts there.

SPEAKER_02 24:50

Yeah. It starts there. I think once you move the heart and move the spirit, the body follows. Yeah. You know, yeah. And I'm learning something with working in nonprofit is that when you go out to do fundraising, it's not about trying to give them all these numbers stats and all that. That's right. It's about the story of the little kid who came into the gym and now he's this, that, or the other. That's right. And he's on the right path, or she's on the right path. Yeah. That's what moves people. Yeah. When you they get something that's a nugget of reality as opposed to just numbers.

SPEAKER_01 25:21

So Orv tells this story. I don't really know him well. I've met him a couple times, but he tells this story about holding a brick in his hand where he's getting ready to throw this brick or stay right there until it's a big thing. Did he tell that story in that? Okay, I might have a story. So it but like I heard him tell that story, I don't know, fifteen years ago or something. A long time ago. Yeah. Uh but that moment like crystallizes in your head. You go, okay, that is one of those moments, right? And so um you hear that and it it not only it's visceral, it sticks with you, but all of the implications that roll from it are I always uh liken the story to I call it sliding doors.

SPEAKER_02 26:03

You know, if you miss the bus, how does your life change? Yeah. If the door opens and you go through but you go left instead of right, how does your life change? Right. I don't you know, you don't know because you didn't go the other way. Right, right. But there has to be a different consequence because now you just went down a different path. That's right. And I I just always get like that. What if, like uh say I met my wife? What if I didn't go to it was this place called Fat City. If I didn't go to Fat City that night. Yeah. Never meet her. Right. Right. Am I still here? Right. Do I would ever know her? Right. Where you end up going.

SPEAKER_01 26:38

I I I love going down those paths and trying to figure life out in in those ways, but even the even th you think about the miracle of your existence, right? Everything had to go right for you to be here.

SPEAKER_02 26:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:49

Right? Think of like one one of your ancestors made one different decision. One you're not here. One, right? One. Um so it's incredible the odds. So yeah, I love it.

SPEAKER_05 27:01

I love it.

SPEAKER_02 27:02

And then you start thinking about all the risks you took along the way. Yeah. What was I thinking? Oh my lord. Oh, I survived that. Oh, I what of the policeman? Put it this way. So I'm 62. Okay. Um how long have we had like iPhones and all that? Maybe 20 years, right? Roughly. Yeah. If we had the technology then that we have now, oh, I wouldn't be.

SPEAKER_01 27:26

Oh, for sure. I mean, my kids, I'm like, oh man, I'm sorry, kids. Your life is being recorded and put online forever. Ever. They didn't they had Polaroid cameras when I was messing around. And so that was bad enough. Right. Um I can't imagine.

SPEAKER_02 27:44

Wait a minute.

SPEAKER_01 27:44

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 27:45

Here's the best the best part about it though. I get to tell stories, and no one can dispute it. Because there's no video I can tell a story I can make myself like I did this, I did that. Yeah. Yeah. You did because there's no film.

SPEAKER_01 28:00

I don't want to let the facts get in the way of a good story. Oh, tell a good story, right? I'm glad you gave me a hey, what a joy, what an honor.

SPEAKER_04 28:09

Hey, stay doing it. We got a story for you.